LOL of the Day

I've recently become obsessed with dancing reality TV shows: America's Best Dance Crew, Dancing with the Stars, So You Think You Can Dance, etc...all these shows make me blame my Mom and Dad on a daily basis for not pushing and shoving me into all possible dance classes when I was younger. Living with regrets at age 23..sigh. FML.

So, i guess last night's episode of So You Think You Can Dance showed a contestant that fell to the floor with so much excitement that she had a vajayjay slip. Don't judge, maybe she is allergic to wearing panties. Anyways, as always, Dlisted says it best:

"Our pure eyes have been tainted. We should have never boarded the Mayflower and come to America. But seriously, it's just a damn vagina. We've all seen one. A little snatch flash isn't going to turn our nation's children into drug addicted sluts with no morals. They will do that on their own." - dlisted.com

"Oh SHIT! A WHALE CAUGHT IN FISHNET!!!!"

I WANTED TO WISH YOU ALL A HAPPY MONDAY MORNING by sharing the following image with you (courtesy of peopleofwalmart.com) So please, before you begin your daily FML facebook/twitter/bbm updates about how much you hate Mondays and everything your boss makes you do, think of her FML thoughts.

Shana Tova to all my Jews

If you refuse to do anymore work on this Friday, just tell your boss something he has NEVER known about you before - you are Jewish...today :)


Happy 5770 New Year!!!

Fashion Week: Possible Side Effects

Dear Fashion Week,

Please advise your stuck up designers and participants to do something better for the world instead of showcasing pieces of unreasonably overpriced fabric on women who get paid to starve and purge themselves. Maybe, Fashion Week should take place in a country where food IS scarce and women are sickly and "naturally" thin due to the lack of resources and nourishment, and while you are at it - feed them and the other starving people of that country.
For as long as the fashion world insists on showcasing overpriced "must-have trends of the season" on unrealistic and malnourished looking women, we will continue to see credit card debt (you can thank Manolo Blahnik for selling you heels that hurt your feet starting at $800 and up and Chanel for selling you a bag starting at $2000 and up) as well as countless eating disorders, diet fads and diet products that are dangerous and cause people to go to the hospital.

I demand that from now on, all Fashion Week shows must include the following disclaimer:

Fashion Week may cause such side effects as:
aggressiveness, anxiety, anorexia nervosa, bulimia, chest pain, cocaine abuse, credit card debt, decreased sex drive, decreased appetite, depression, difficulty swallowing, headache, high blood pressure, migraine, nausea, nervousness, nose bleed, pain, paranoia, plastic surgery, rapid mood shifts, thoughts of harming yourself, etc.

Unfortunately, this probably won't change much since most prescription medicines come with these disclaimers and people still insist on abusing prescription pills ;)

It is a beautiful, beautiful world.

I couldn't have said it better myself

After looking at some sickly pix of the ICONIC figure that is Victoria Beckham, I came across a comment that pretty much summarized my deep inner feelings during my lunchtime:

"I'm so sick of these walking eating disorders being praised and admired when in fact they are seriously effed in the head.
I was about to go make myself a sandwich for lunch, but I guess now I'll just go nibble a piece of lettuce and then spit it out and then run 6 miles to purge myself of all that food I ate. Fuck."
- Submitted by hotmess119 on Fri, 09/11/2009 - 11:01am.

I think I just found my Halloween Costume and it will only cost me $6.85

"90 people get the Swine Flu and everyone wears a face mask. Millions of people have AIDS but noone wears a condom."

I am so amused right now by a website called Flu Armour that sells "Pandemic Influenza Defense System Products." You can order a variety of goodies such as Masks, Gloves, Wipes, Protective Goggles, Emergency Food Supply for 4 weeks, and MY personal favorite - the Disposable Coverall Suit.


Ladies and Gentleman, I hereby declare that on October 31, 2009 I will go dressed as "Swine Girl" for Halloween. Please refrain from asking me such dumb questions as:
"Who are you supposed to be?" DUH - I will be Swine Girl in this sexy get-up for a whopping $6.85.