FALLEN PRINCESSES

Dina Goldstein has really captured my attention with her Fallen Princesses photographs that take the conventional Happily Ever After Disney stories and put them into modern day perspective.
What if Disney kept it real with the little girls and showed them a not so happy outcome of an unfortunate life...


What if Princess Jasmine from Aladdin lived in the Middle East today...would she find herself in war zone defending her kingdom with an AK47?


What if Princess Belle from Beauty and the Beast lived in our youth-obsessed society, would she be regular at Dr. 90210 maintaining her "Belle" reputation?

A photograph that truly touched me and has left an unsettling dose of reality was a picture of Rapunzel...sitting on a hospital bed with her famous and lustrous braid by her side. What if Rapunzel had cancer and lost her hair during chemotherapy?



Unfortunately the exhibit, so far, only took place in Vancouver, CA at the Buschlen Mowatt Gallery from Oct 15-Nov 15, but you can check out all the amazing photographs on Dina Goldstein's website - http://www.fallenprincesses.com/

Where do I sign up to make a sex tape with a "famous" rapper?

I am obsessed with everything Kardashian, go ahead - judge me, I don't care. I love all their staged reality show episodes; I love all the irrelevant shit they do that doesn't benefit our society; I love the 20 pounds of makeup they wear on their faces for us, the $800 YSL and Christian Louboutin heels they wear to look cute for us cuz every day is a photoshoot. I mean, I'm not afraid to put it out there, I'd like to be adopted as their 6th sister. Sonya Kardashian sounds pretty nice, right? Actually, I am thinking of legally changing my name, yet again, to Sonya Kreizmanian.
This morning, I saw Kim twitter about what a dream come true it is for her to be on the cover of Cosmopolitan magazine. Wow, come to think of how famous this girl has become from simply making a sex tape with a rapper is truly an accomplishment. I mean she is more famous than that Ray J guy nowadays! She should be idolized by all men and women alike and should serve as a "Become a Celeb for Dummies" spokesperson.
Now, where do I sign up to make a sex tape with a rapper? My goal is to be on the cover of Cosmopolitan by 2012 before the world ends. If you know any rappers, please email/text/bbm/twitter/facebook and lastly call me ;)

The definition of FML

I have never wanted to say FML more and meant it.





I secretly wish that her parents were my parents so they could pay for me to star in my own remake ot Lady Gaga's Paparazzi video, although i'd NEVER replace Alexander Skarsgard with a 9 year old shirtless boy.

I am just speechless - Dlisted sums it up nicely

LOL of the Day

I've recently become obsessed with dancing reality TV shows: America's Best Dance Crew, Dancing with the Stars, So You Think You Can Dance, etc...all these shows make me blame my Mom and Dad on a daily basis for not pushing and shoving me into all possible dance classes when I was younger. Living with regrets at age 23..sigh. FML.

So, i guess last night's episode of So You Think You Can Dance showed a contestant that fell to the floor with so much excitement that she had a vajayjay slip. Don't judge, maybe she is allergic to wearing panties. Anyways, as always, Dlisted says it best:

"Our pure eyes have been tainted. We should have never boarded the Mayflower and come to America. But seriously, it's just a damn vagina. We've all seen one. A little snatch flash isn't going to turn our nation's children into drug addicted sluts with no morals. They will do that on their own." - dlisted.com

"Oh SHIT! A WHALE CAUGHT IN FISHNET!!!!"

I WANTED TO WISH YOU ALL A HAPPY MONDAY MORNING by sharing the following image with you (courtesy of peopleofwalmart.com) So please, before you begin your daily FML facebook/twitter/bbm updates about how much you hate Mondays and everything your boss makes you do, think of her FML thoughts.

Shana Tova to all my Jews

If you refuse to do anymore work on this Friday, just tell your boss something he has NEVER known about you before - you are Jewish...today :)


Happy 5770 New Year!!!

Fashion Week: Possible Side Effects

Dear Fashion Week,

Please advise your stuck up designers and participants to do something better for the world instead of showcasing pieces of unreasonably overpriced fabric on women who get paid to starve and purge themselves. Maybe, Fashion Week should take place in a country where food IS scarce and women are sickly and "naturally" thin due to the lack of resources and nourishment, and while you are at it - feed them and the other starving people of that country.
For as long as the fashion world insists on showcasing overpriced "must-have trends of the season" on unrealistic and malnourished looking women, we will continue to see credit card debt (you can thank Manolo Blahnik for selling you heels that hurt your feet starting at $800 and up and Chanel for selling you a bag starting at $2000 and up) as well as countless eating disorders, diet fads and diet products that are dangerous and cause people to go to the hospital.

I demand that from now on, all Fashion Week shows must include the following disclaimer:

Fashion Week may cause such side effects as:
aggressiveness, anxiety, anorexia nervosa, bulimia, chest pain, cocaine abuse, credit card debt, decreased sex drive, decreased appetite, depression, difficulty swallowing, headache, high blood pressure, migraine, nausea, nervousness, nose bleed, pain, paranoia, plastic surgery, rapid mood shifts, thoughts of harming yourself, etc.

Unfortunately, this probably won't change much since most prescription medicines come with these disclaimers and people still insist on abusing prescription pills ;)

It is a beautiful, beautiful world.

I couldn't have said it better myself

After looking at some sickly pix of the ICONIC figure that is Victoria Beckham, I came across a comment that pretty much summarized my deep inner feelings during my lunchtime:

"I'm so sick of these walking eating disorders being praised and admired when in fact they are seriously effed in the head.
I was about to go make myself a sandwich for lunch, but I guess now I'll just go nibble a piece of lettuce and then spit it out and then run 6 miles to purge myself of all that food I ate. Fuck."
- Submitted by hotmess119 on Fri, 09/11/2009 - 11:01am.

I think I just found my Halloween Costume and it will only cost me $6.85

"90 people get the Swine Flu and everyone wears a face mask. Millions of people have AIDS but noone wears a condom."

I am so amused right now by a website called Flu Armour that sells "Pandemic Influenza Defense System Products." You can order a variety of goodies such as Masks, Gloves, Wipes, Protective Goggles, Emergency Food Supply for 4 weeks, and MY personal favorite - the Disposable Coverall Suit.


Ladies and Gentleman, I hereby declare that on October 31, 2009 I will go dressed as "Swine Girl" for Halloween. Please refrain from asking me such dumb questions as:
"Who are you supposed to be?" DUH - I will be Swine Girl in this sexy get-up for a whopping $6.85.

My New Addiction

I had a bad morning filled with anxiety and panic attacks because my new favorite website did not work for a while and scared me with all sorts of messages such as: "this website domain no longer exists" and "the page you are looking for might have been removed" etc.
I pretty much said my goodbyes in my mind, since I am almost 100% sure that the content on this site is illegal and it will soon be reported and/or sued..but in the meantime, the site is BACK, and I couldn't be happier...
ENJOY - http://peopleofwalmart.com/

p.s. this is EXACTLY the reason why only LADY GAGA can get away with wearing NO PANTS.


p.p.s. thank GOD for their twitter updates reassuring us everything is ok and they will be back up soon! http://twitter.com/peopleofwalmart

Quote of The Day

"If God has the time to work on this production and that's the best God can do, then we are all in trouble"
- Anderson Hays Cooper (although i think he should legally substitute H. to stand for Hot and not Hays)
I would just like to ask the Miss Universe Pageant Organization one question, did they actually pay Heidi Montag to sing because they knew their ratings were going to be low and the only way to attract a broader audience was to hire a bad dancing, bad lip-syncing, fame seeking blond bimbo so we'd all tune in and laugh? I think their plan backfired, because more people talk about Heidi's (my fingers refuse to type the word "performance" in this sentence, I just looked up the antonym, and the dictionary told me "failure" so that sounds about right) than the actual pageant...go figure.

Quote of the Day

"97% of Hollywood, the entire state of Florida, every person with the last name Lohan and half the bankers on Wall Street just moved to Mexico. ARRIBA!" - Dlisted.com

Well, well, well, just when we all thought Mexico was THE location for a guaranteed memory loss Spring Break, Mexico now guarantees you to have a drug-induced coma Spring Break. Apparently, "No charges will be brought against ... addicts or consumers who are found in possession of any narcotic for personal use," the Senate bill reads. Wow, what a nice country!
Let's keep the addicts addicted and turn the consumers into addicts since they ALWAYS need some narcotics for "personal use" to keep the high going.
You can legally carry the following amounts of drugs in your fannypack in Mexico: 5 grams of weed, the equivalent of about four joints. Half a gram of cocaine, the equivalent of about 4 lines. 50 milligrams of heroin, 40 milligrams of methamphetamine and 0.015 milligrams of LSD.
Just out of curiosity, what did they set as an acceptable and "legal" DUI limit for an amount of drugs to be in somebody's system before they get physically impaired, get behind the wheel and take away somebody's life?

Allow Me...

Allow me to put in my 2 cents...

Many of my friends have been addressing numerous Lady Gaga related questions to me since I know more about her than any subject i studied at school...and i guess i deserve it since I've converted to Lady Gaga-ism. So Here it goes, my opinion on the infamous & controversial question about Gaga's Hermaphrodite-ness. Here is the dumb video that started this rumor -

I'm sorry but whatever brain-dead loser started this rumor obviously has never seen a penis in their uneventful lifetime...I DON'T see anything. So, no I don't think Gaga has a big dick because we would have all seen it a million times.
Another reason to love her: this is what she posted on her fbook page in response to this funny situation:

Lady Gaga "Love you Japan! Pokerface just went #1! Thanku!!. My show was so good last night. I just had to go home and suck my own hermie dick, suckka" - August 7 at 8:43pm

maybe just the hair...

OMG

OMG, I'm sorry but how is my boyfriend, Bruce Willis supposed to SAVE US when we don't have enough funds to detect big ass, catastrophic asteroids?
According to an article on cnn.com, NASA will not meet its goal of tracking 90 percent of all deadly asteroids by 2020 without MORE funding.
Well fuck that, stop buying $1695.00 pair of boots and $3000 chanel bags and let's start putting money in Brucey's pension on a mission fund!
Thanks.

Quote of the Day

as always, Michael K Dlisted makes my day: "two young girls crying with excitement, because they are posing with amateur porn star Kim Kardassian"

GET RICH

Just when I thought i was gonna get rich from selling my stuff on the internet, i get this in response. FML





"Hi,

I noticed your ad for the shoes. I just happened to be a guy who has
a foot/shoe fetish. Would you be interested in selling me your shoes?
By the way, how would you feel about doing a foot fetish session? I
see you have very pretty feet since u wear these sexy shoes.
I would pay well for that. I am a 30 year old, professional
executive. I'd like to meet up at perhaps a starbucks so that we both
feel comfortable. Let me know how you feel and if u'd be interested.

thanks"

to make the story worse, i facebook searched his email address and a profile actually came up. What a creep.

I am not YOUR MAMI!!!!

I AM NOT YOUR MAMI!

Walking through NYC streets during lunch hour can be claustrophobic enough, so I could really do without the assholes who stand around and get up in my face to call me "Mami" and "sexy" along with any other Spanish or English phrases I try to block out as I frantically dial somebody to seem busy on the phone. Why is this accepted? Women don't stand around calling guys "sexy" and "papi" in the streets, maybe after midnight on certain streets, but still...
I am furious because I was having a very intimate moment with a cookie i was devouring as I walked and while I was in the middle of sensually biting into it, like a vampire would bite a human (I've been watching too much True Blood lately), a fucking idiot had to get close and call me "Mami!" WTF??? my special, intimate moment RUINED.
I like to think of these stupid & sad human beings as paparazzi without a camera.
You know, come to think of it, I'd rather be famous because the harassment is pretty much the same - so what's a few more blinding flashes along with the "mami" and "sexy" and "ooohhh damn girl you looking good today" AND the kissy noises as if I'm a fucking puppy. No, I will not run to you and lick your face!

PLEASE GO TO HELL

http://perezhilton.com/2009-08-05-listen-up-doug-paris-dog-house-is-damn-comfortable

DE PRESSED

I am depressed.
No, i'm not depressed about my own life and Yes, I am aware that I could be living in Afghanistan, or Darfur or any other more depressing place than New York. I am depressed about the world.
Everyone is fucking depressed. The rich are depressed, the poor are depressed, what are we to do?

1. While people starve in 3rd world countries, millions of girls and guys (who can afford a meal) starve on purpose because we all have body image insecurities thanks to countless tv shows, music videos and covers of magazines that photoshop what a real body looks like. Who the fuck decided that photoshopping faces and bodies is what looks good? I'd really like to meet that person and beat him up (shut up, violence is the not the answer but a real fucking eye-opener).
2. While people are in major credit card and financial debt, or those who simply cannot afford to buy desirable or "in-style" latest collections, ridiculous people like Anna Wintour, make women believe that they need to spend $700 on a pair of shoes or $1500 on a fucking bag. REALLY? I'd like to know why it is so important to own a pair of shoes that cost as much as a vacation?
3. Shame on those designers and celebrity turned designers who came from nothing and now sell jeans, shoes, dresses that cost thousands of dollars and put people in further financial debt and depression because they can't look as cool as the photoshopped bitches in the ads of Vogue
4. Please stop taking anti-depressants, pain-killers, and other shit that dull your senses and put a band-aid on your depression. All these chemicals turn you into nothing but a bunch of zombies that are "happy"
   

People have really lost touch with what is important in life and i am depressed and disgusted.
Our world gets crazier by the day, and it becomes way too too difficult to always look at the positive and bright side.

Happiness...

Happiness is a word that gets said a lot but not many people experience. Who is truly happy these days?
You would think celebrities have it all - fame, money, good looks, nose & boobs jobs and botox. And yet, their unhappiness and meltdowns are splattered before our eyes on every magazine cover, online news site, daily newspaper, etc. Everywhere I look, i see something about celebrities breaking up, releasing sex tapes, overdosing, being admitted to hospitals for psychiatric evaluations, and the list goes on.
It's becoming apparent that happiness is not a frequent flyer to Hollywood.
I think to find happiness, one must become involved in a great cause that is close to the heart. If that cause is realized and contributed to with utmost love, care and dedication, then its creator will be happy.
What makes you happy?

Quote of the Day

"Whatever I stood for and advocated I still believe to be true. Just because I fell short of God's standard ... doesn't mean that God's standard is reduced."

- Paul Stanley, Tennessee state senator

Paul Stanley has been fucking his 22 year old intern since April (his wife was aware of the affair). Stanley cut funding for Planned Parenthood because he BELIEVES UNMARRIED people should NOT be having sex...
Please explain yourself to God, your wife, and your two kids.

p.s. He resigned today.

WHY do all these God loving and God's standard proclaiming people like priests, politicians, etc ALWAYS seem to "fall short of God's standard?"
I think I hate hypocrites more than I hate airplanes.

Never Enough Time

New Post coming soon.

Working Girl

No, this is not what it looks like. I did not pick up after a dog on the street.
This is a chocolate, 60 calories munchkin that I devoured in .2 seconds and am pretty sure could have won the fastest time for eating a munchkin award, if such an award existed.


While watching reruns of Sex and the City the other day (which i live for on CW11 at 11:30 pm, and on TBS at 12 am AND 12:30 am - the TV God is good) I saw an episode of Samantha, Charlotte, Carrie and Miranda sitting in Bryant Park and discussing their busy lives. Miranda summed up her life as "Work, Work, Au Bon Pain, and Work" and I couldn't relate more. When someone asks me about how my life is after college, I now respond "Work, Work, Dunkin Donuts, and Work."
So, earlier today during my usual run to Dunkin Donuts while waiting for my coffee, my eyes scanned the calorie amounts revealed under each delicious tray of love & happiness filled donuts, bagels, etc. My eyes settled on a 60 calories, chocolate munchkin tray and I decided that since I never buy anything else from Dunkin Donuts besides liquids, I deserve a lil something something - plus I needed some sugar to get through the rest of the work day. The lovely worker placed my munchkin into the paper bag as I paid and headed back upstairs to the office. As I peeked inside the bag in the elevator ride up, I saw not one, but two munchkin stuck together! Feelings of happiness and sadness overwhelmed me at the same time. I was happy because I now had 2 munchkins for the price of one and 2 chocolate anything is always better than one. I felt sad because I knew there was no way I could resist the second munchkin and "put it down and step away from the munchkin." As I got to the office, I devoured the first munchkin and wrapped the second one away and put it my drawer...needless to say, a minutes later, I swung open my drawer as if there was a thousand dollars in there waiting for me, and devoured the 2nd munchkin. But like they say, "if nobody saw it, then it didn't happen."

Dear Weather, take some Motrin and stop PMSing

Dear Weather,

please stop burning CA and drowning NY.

While wildfires spread and destroy my future dreams of moving and safely living in California, there have been non-stop downpours in NY. I think it's time for me to move to a place where the weather doesn't PMS as much.

LOL of the Day

As I was reading MY morning version of the NY Times on the train...aka the genius that is Michael K's www.dlisted.com, I saw a lil news update about our Ms. Blohan doing a photo shoot for Spanish Vogue as Marilyn Monroe.

Lol as you read below:

"Why does HoHan hate Marilyn Monroe so much? If HoHan loved Marilyn unconditionally, she would quit dragging her beautiful image through the gutter

by posing as her over and over again. We all know what happend the last time. It wasn't pretty.

I mean, Marilyn Monroe's body TODAY probably looks better than this trick. When you're trying to look like Marilyn Monroe, but only end up looking like Pamela Anderson after getting gang banged by a dozen sumo wrestlers, it's time to hang up your wig and give it up.

Here's more of HoHan working the hardest she has all month at a photo shoot for Spanish Vogue."

Now I don't have anything againt Lindsay, when i met her @ Bungalow8, she was a very sweet girl...Yes, I was at the tanorexic stage of my life in the picture below, my skin tone is closer to Michael Jackson's color nowdays.

It's great that she's doing work these days, but I'd like to ask Spanish Vogue why take America's leftovers and put her in their magazine?

Gaga for President

So, I'm pretty sick of fuckbook (facebook), twatter (twitter), have given up on myspace a few years ago, and am now looking for something of substantial value - thus I've turned to blogging.
I have become completely obsessed with Lady Gaga as many of my friends will attest to. I found an amazing quote of hers that I feel like I have been living by for the past couple of years.
"Once I grabbed the reigns of my artistry,
I fell in love with that more than I did with the party life."
Unfortunately, or fortunately I was a HUGE party girl at Fordham and needless to say paid the consequences of my nightlife abuse and got pretty burned out. Living in Manhattan for 4 years made me realize that NYC is about 2 things only, unless you are a tourist. And these 2 things are: restaurants and clubs. Well, I'm sick of both - so now where do I go? Yes, in a perfect world - if i was some trust fund baby, I could pack my shit up and move to California with no fear of not having a steady income and worrying about paying off my stupid college loans. But that's not the case, so what does one do to get out of depression of being an adult and having responsibilities...I turned to my artistic side and discovered a brand new world. I've recently began to think that to LIVE is to BE CREATIVE. I always had a talent for painting as a child but i never really developed it. I began to paint a few years ago and fell in love with what my right hand could do with some paint, a brush and a blank canvas! The feedback that i've been getting from my dear friends has been so tremendously encouraging and I am very thankful for your honest opinions and words of encourgement. I am submitting some paintings of mine to a gallery in NYC to see if any of them make the cut for an opening. My passion for art has opened my eyes to photography as well, since i tend to get most of my ideas from pictures i take or pictures i stumble upon in my friends' facebook albums. I absolutely love anything visual: photographs, paintings, film and one day would like to have my own production company that specializes in various aspects of visual art.
So, i guess you can say that I'm growing up as I become more aware of my own talents to waste time on instead of wasting it on the same routine of nightlife. In life, you have to be proud of your choices because in the end of the day you are your own judge. So it's nothing personal to those friends that feel like I've been distant and out of the scene. It's only because I am discovering and dedicating most of my time and nights to something I am passionate about besides my other favs: shots of patron, fashion, and clubs.

To conclude, here is a B&W photo that I took at Terminal 5 when Lady Gaga performed this past weekend. I think this is a really good candid photograph and i got really lucky with the lighting that gives it that professional look. (if you click on it, it will open up in its full size in another window =)